Having spent the morning in a mind-numbing fury while trying to print two pages of an IRS document necessary to report the income (ha-ha) from my business (hee-hee) over the past year, I have probably burnt out my two remaining brain cells, as well as ensuring that I will return to earth as a nematode, and probably not the beneficial sort. A quiet acceptance of the world's vagaries was not demonstrated by moi.
On the other hand, THE COMPOSTING ARTICLE IS UP, all hundred and fifty pages of it, looking quite well-behaved and tidy for something so sprawling, even voracious. Amazing, how Eric has reduced the monster that dominated my life for months to a meek little sidebar. (The mysteries of translating a Word document into a website are beyond me; I use “translate” here in its old theological meaning of “to transport to heaven without natural death.”)
Eric by the way is Eric Vinge, of Planet Natural who asked me to write an article on compost. So I did. (If I'd had any idea…. Then again, if he'd had any idea….) Anyway, now it's got a name ("Compost: In the Bin, the Barden, and the Environment") and a home site (The Composter Connection) and one of those nifty pictures done by Eric's artist, whose name I cannot find, but I promise that when I do, I'll put it up.
This article has got everything, and if you think it doesn't, I dare you to prove it. Come on, put 'em up; let's see your footwork. All that talk don't mean nothin'. Meet me in the alley, and we'll see what you're really made of. Just be sure to bring whatever it is you think you know about composting.
Here are a few of the things you'll find on the site:
• how much organic matter soil should have;
• how to build the hottest compost pile ever;
• how many First Nation tribes have sued Toronto over the location of its new landfill site;
• why compost sometimes smells, and what to do about it;
• why composting is better environmentally than landfills;
• how often worm bins need to be cleaned;
• how to use compost to stop runoff;
• where to find out how to make your own Bokashi starter;
• what Bokashi is;
• how to compost in the desert and who knows way more about it than I do;
• how compost breaks down pesticides;
• how big a compost pile needs to be in order to heat up;
• how worms are degrading some boreal forests;
• eight different ways to build a compost bin;
• how much compost is too much for your lawn;
• what percent of U.S. municipal waste is food scraps;
• where to find home tests for compost maturity;
• how compost raises low pH and lowers high pH;
• the seven ways compost kills harmful pathogens (no, it’s not just heat);
• how compost improves plant access to nutrients;
• how many months the Mobro was at sea with a load of Long Island garbage back in 1987 and how many states (and nations) barred it from docking.
I’m beginning to think I should start a trivia contest based on this thing. Prizes for the first person who can find the picture of the world’s biggest worm! Apparently I left out how many million tons of methane are produced by landfills in the US yearly (138), but I’m working to get it back in.
IN THE MEANTIME, while we at Gardner's Games Galore are designing a board for the upcoming Compost Trivia Event of the Year, we invite you to try your hands at this: